Miracles in the Waiting

So I’m in the “Two week wait.”  For those of you new to the infertility world (or to the Trying to Conceive World for that matter) the two week wait is the time between ovulation and your expected period.  Its the time when conception has or hasn’t occurred, but there isn’t much way to find out until that two week waiting period is over.  Its as if I were buying a gun or something with this two week waiting period!  🙂  And for me, I have to wait two weeks and two days from the time of the HCG shot.  So in the meantime…

…I’m digging into my new business, Thirty-One!  Its proven to be a great distraction from the little twinges, aches, and possible pregnancy symptoms that I’m feeling (or imagining I’m feeling).

…I’m also reading others’ blogs on the subject of infertility.  I’ve come across one that I’m really liking, finding comfort from, and relating to all at the same time.  Its Waiting for Grace.  The author, Hannah, is very vulnerable with her and her husbands infertility path.  The grace of God is evident in her writing.  On March 8th, 2012 she wrote an entry titled, “From Mud to Miracles.”  In it she talks about the condition of our heart in the waiting for a miracle, and uses John 9 to do so.  Its a good read, go visit!

She said:

So often I find myself finding some fault in myself for the reason I’m having trouble getting pregnant. I think, “What is so wrong with me that God doesn’t want me to have a baby?” In reading this story in John about the blind man I found that he asked the same thing. This scripture punched me in the gut:

This happened so the power of God could be seen in him. John 9:3-4

Whoa. Do you ever read a scripture you’ve read a thousand times and then at one particular moment those words seem to flash at you like light outside a window while you’re trying to sleep? It jolts you out of that deep spiritual sleep you’ve been in and slaps you across the face.

And as I read that part, tears began to well up in my eyes.  To think that this is happening to me so that the power of God could be seen in me!  WOW!  Immediately a picture flashed in my head of the day I announce my pregnancy to my church.  And the words, with tears came from my mouth, “I’m pregnant now, so that the power of God can be seen!  It is through the power of God that this happened.  All glory is given to Him.”

So in this two week wait, Lord, help me to remember your power being displayed through me one day.  Help me to keep my eyes focused on you and this awesome picture you’ve given me!  Help me remember that this journey is for your Glory!

It’ll happen when it happens!

So today, day 11 in my cycle I went in for my first ultrasound this round, the results: not ready. So I go back in two days to check again. So we wait.

I’m getting better at waiting, I think. Its still hard, but I think I’ve reached a point not that I’m more in the “it’ll happen when it happens” boat rather than the “OMG! could it be now? How about now? No. Ok, Maybe now?” boat. Its much for peaceful and relaxing in this boat! I think my new adventure is helping in distracting me as well. Its keeping me a bit more busy than usual, so my mind hasn’t had much chance to wonder to much!

So we’ll see what my next appointment brings! One appointment at a time, one thing at a time, one day at a time…that’s all I can work with, the rest is solely in the Hands of the Almighty!!

My New Adventure

So this week I’ve embarked on a new adventure. I’ve signed up to be a Thirty-One Gifts consultant. I’ve been trying to find something part-time to help get me out of the house, and keep me occupied through the “down-time” of my normal job. After months of considering different home businesses, applying to different place, I decided to land with Thirty-One! I’m so excited to get moving forward with this new adventure. And today, this new adventure gave me a new connection in the world of fertility issues.

I went into my bank today to open an account for Thirty-One, and met with the general manager of my branch. She was so friendly and easy to talk to, through the course of the conversation she revealed that her and her husband tried for 2.5 years before their beautiful baby girl arrived! They were in the beginning stages of exploring fertility treatments when they conceived! We talked for about twenty minutes about that and other things. I feel like I made a connection and at the very least, I hope I showed her Christ!

So…here’s to my new adventure and it bringing me all sorts of new connections!